I now own a nice bike lock. It is super strong and really heavy, possibly heavier than my two-year-old son. It is orange and black, and I open the lock with a key.
The sales guy at the store asked me where I was planning to lock my bike and recommended a pretty hefty lock, much heftier than I would have bought. I have not been locking my bike so my sense of security is pretty high. On the other hand, he is a salesperson and I might have been shamboozled.
(Shamboozled is bamboozled but by a sales person.)
This bike lock is probably worth more than my bike. I am guessing the bike lock is easier to sell than a bike. So, Dear Bike Thieves, I would recommend stealing the lock, not my old bike.